Motherhood and the superpower of maturity

I am 56 years old and have three grown children: one 26, one 24, and one 20. Right now, I'm thrilled that it's like this. I like that they've grown up and that I can maintain a different relationship with them; and even though two of them haven't left home yet, I can already do my own thing. It sounds selfish. And it is. On everyone's part. They have immense desires to live their own lives, and so do I. They no longer need me to survive, and I live this absence of vital need with joy. Does this mean we don't want to share together? Absolutely not, but the dependence of small children has faded and has freed us. That sweetness of a child has also gone. But I didn't have children like someone raises bonsais, and that they have grown up seems logical, fantastic, wonderful to me.To begin with, she no longer lives at home and the relationship is a pleasure. From time to time I bribe her with a lunchbox, or by going for a set menu when I don't have time to cook. She has also invited me to dinner at her place a few times. We talk often on the phone or WhatsApp, we see each other, but the terms of our mother-daughter contract have changed. I will always be her mother, but from a different perspective. Freer, more equal, more adult.Is everything ideal? No, of course not. Especially with the two children remaining, because living together is never easy. Obviously we get annoyed. Obviously they would like to leave but they can't yet. Obviously sometimes they are fed up with me and I with them. But we can talk about everything in a different way, and when I get nervous about the chronic mess or whatever, I can tell them one of my favorite phrases: "I'm not scolding you like a mother to a small child anymore, I'm telling you, you who are already an adult." Because I am truly happy with my life, with three adult children. Young, but adults, and I can't help but see advantages. Such as, for example, them actively worrying about me.A great advantage

Not long ago I had a serious personal problem and I explained it to one of my children, and he explained it to his siblings so that they would all know. When I realized it, I felt strange. I imagined them sharing my sadness and conspiring to be attentive, just as I am with them. And what can I tell you, I was moved in an extra-magdalena mode.But the great advantage is that it all catches me in the mature stage, because it makes me live everything in a different way. How to learn that the chickens to be resolved in their lives are above all their own. With me by their side, but their own. My work is done and my role is another: to be there, to accompany them and to allow them to move forward. Yes, I am lucky that menopause has not caught me with teenage children. But, even so, when I see women my age who are facing their children's adolescence, I compare it to when I lived it a few years ago and I think that now they have this superpower. Because maturity is that, and you just have to be aware of it and enjoy it.