The other day, at a social gathering (they call it baby shower and I haven't been able to sleep since), there was a mother with a small child in a stroller. She was next to me, so I could see how she was looking, all worried, at children's reels on her mobile phone (a phone the size of the middle slice of a rustic loaf). To spare myself the sight of the creature passing, with its little fingers, disturbing frogs with a narco accent, I made a joke. The kind of jokes you make to kids. Then the mother looked at me, condescendingly, and said: "You'll be a good grandmother." If my daughter made a joke to the same creature or said things to it, the deceased wouldn't tell her: "You'll be a good mother."
It's not known if I'll be a good grandmother or a magnificent great-grandmother, but for what reason should I be given this role? Can't I be a woman who feels a special interest in little beings and wants to interact with them? I am more than just a future good grandmother. I will be a good grandmother (generally everyone is) depending on the day. I talk to the child because I want to, because I feel sorry that they have him tied to the stroller with a mobile phone, but that doesn't mean I want to change his diapers; I don't want them to assume the privilege of handing the child over to me, as if it were "the law of life." It's the first feeling of ageism I've had. I am not just one thing. I am not, above all, an "old lady." I am a writer, I am a wine enthusiast, I am an amateur farmer, I am the owner of three cats, I am a farmhand, I am very funny, I am an amateur decorator, I am a conversationalist, I am a dancer, I am a friend to children and young people, I am sociable, I am unsociable, I am a collector of books, wine barrels, plants, and above all, I am so proudly immature that I don't like to be considered a good grandmother avant la lettre. When I say "hello" to a child now, some parents smile with tenderness and complicity. They'd want me in an apron while they recommend series to each other and deliberately exaggerate our lack of skill with devices (those devices they always give to children).
