Rafael Santandreu: "Sleeping well is important but not as much as they have sold us"

BarcelonaHalf of adults have trouble sleeping. Why? Psychologist and author best-sellerRafael Santandreu assures that "the number 1 factor in insomnia is the hyper-demand that one must sleep perfectly well, always." Therefore, one of the main goals of his latest book, "Sleep when you can't sleep (Wind Rose), is, first and foremost, to lower the pressure: "Sleeping well is important, yes, but not as much as they have sold us. And this exaggeration causes a paradoxical effect: the fear of not sleeping prevents us from sleeping".

Often, the first and only resource offered by healthcare is pills, when they should be the last resort, because the expert assures that most insomnia has a solution: "People need to know that sleep is learned, just like learning to control the urge to urinate. We are not born knowing how to sleep for eight hours. Sleeping soundly without waking up all night, that is the Holy Grail, the most restorative sleep, and the good news is that you can sleep like that again," he promises. Based on his experience with patients, the psychologist has categorized three types of insomnia and outlines three routines to become marmots. Sometimes, the steps can be counterintuitive, but he assures that they have proven effectiveness.

The fear of not sleeping must be faced like anxiety attacks, by going through that irrational anguish, that is, by not sleeping. His prescription is to spend two or three nights a week in bed without voluntarily sleeping, watching movies, making photo albums, distracting yourself. "When people experience that they can be in their bed without sleeping, very happy, this insomnia is solved forever." In many cases, in one night, he assures. That is why Santandreu is a great detractor of the rules ofsleep hygiene, because they cause more nervousness and do not address the root of insomnia. "I sleep well, but not always. The key is that I don't care. And the next day I'm full of energy. Tiredness and bad mood after a sleepless night are psychological, it's autosuggestion".

According to the psychologist, before antidepressants, sleep deprivation was a common treatment for depression. "It is proven that human beings, evolutionarily speaking, are made to not sleep from time to time. Furthermore, a night without sleep or with little sleep regulates the circadian cycle, it's like a reset in your sleep-wake system, and it makes you sleep more deeply from that day on." He makes a comparison with fasting: "Is eating important? Yes, it is important for survival. But not eating all the time, and periodically stopping eating can even be good."

When the problem is sleep desynchronization, and you have light and fragmented sleep, for example due to motherhood or a bad period, the recommendation is to "go to bed later, not earlier," to group sleep hours into a continuous block at the end of the night. If we know that, subtracting the hours of nocturnal awakenings, we actually sleep five hours, let's do it from 2 to 7 in the morning, to guarantee deep sleep. When the brain has consolidated the change and you sleep soundly, you need to gradually extend these hours. His recommendation is that "if after fifteen minutes you see that you are not falling asleep, do not force sleep, mentally give up on sleeping and stay in bed doing something else you like: watch series, read, pray, imagine a novel, think about the vacation route... Being happy predisposes you to sleep."

When the origin of insomnia is daytime worries, it is about training the mind "to radically change your view of the world and your priorities," says the psychologist, who has published seven books with tools to be happier. "95% of the stress we experience is self-inflicted. It's not your boss, nor your job, nor your neighbors, nor your children... It's you," he points out.

Santandreu states that you need to change your "internal dialogue" and your feelings of drama, which he has dubbed "necessitis" and "terribilitis". "You have to work on your hyper-expectations during the day. Basically, we demand three types of things from ourselves: one, to do everything very well; two, that others always treat me well; and three, that the world works as it should. You have to realize that this is unrealistic, very immature, and even superstitious. And above all, that you need much less to be happy!" the psychologist concludes. The change is not easy, because it requires determination and consistency, but he is clear that it is worth it: "The reward is happiness."