3 tips to recover desire

Recovering desire is a common concern for many couples at some point in the relationship. And it's completely natural: no one has explained to us that sexual desire is not constant, but rather something that also needs to be cared for and worked on.

The first piece of advice is not to compare your current desire with what you had at the beginning of the relationship. In the beginning, this often happens naturally; with falling in love, our desire is sky-high, and this combines with the enthusiasm and excitement of getting to know someone new. And precisely because of this, the first key is to understand that the beginning is an exceptional moment, not the point of reference to which one must return. Comparing ourselves to it only generates frustration, because it is not realistic: the frequency is usually much higher than average.

The second piece of advice is not to have sex without desire.We often do it "because it's time," and this can end up making the problem bigger. If we have sex without desire, we probably won't enjoy it and will associate the experience as something more unpleasant than pleasant. In sexuality, quality is much more important than quantity.

Finally, the third piece of advice is to take out the calendar and schedule intimacy. At first glance, it may seem strange, but it's not about scheduling sex itself, but about creating spaces to reconnect: sharing time, caresses, massages, or dates that foster closeness. Recovering this connection is often the first step for desire to reappear. Because, without quality time, the reasons for desiring the other person are also lost.