3 tips to recover desire

Reigniting desire is a common concern for many couples at some point in their relationship. And it's completely natural: no one has explained to us that sexual desire isn't constant, but rather something that also needs to be nurtured and worked on.

The first piece of advice is not to compare your current desire with what you had at the beginning of the relationship. In the beginning, this often happens naturally; with infatuation, our desire is sky-high, and this combines with the enthusiasm and excitement of getting to know someone new. And precisely for this reason, the first key is to understand that the beginning is an exceptional moment, not the benchmark to return to. Comparing ourselves to it only generates frustration because it's unrealistic: the frequency is usually well above average.

The second piece of advice is not to have sex without desire.We often do it "because it's time," and this can end up making the problem bigger. If we have sex without desire, we probably won't enjoy it and will associate the experience as something more unpleasant than pleasant. In sexuality, quality is much more important than quantity.

Finally, the third piece of advice is to take out the calendar and schedule intimacy. At first glance, it might seem strange, but it's not about scheduling sex itself, but about creating spaces to reconnect: sharing time, caresses, massages, or dates that foster closeness. Rekindling this connection is often the first step for desire to reappear. Because, without quality time, the reasons for desiring the other person are also lost.