Soldat Taras: "We are not murderers, but we have no choice."

At the end of August, I spent a Sunday in Kiiv with soldier TarasTaking advantage of the vacation leave granted to him by the Ukrainian army to rest for a few days at home, Private Taras returned to the trenches a week later, fighting on the front lines as commander of a drone unit. He was there for four months. Now he has returned to Kyiv, coinciding with the Christmas holidays. Soon he will be called back to his positions. "War is like that movie," he said. Groundhog Day;"Everything repeats itself," she says jokingly. Private Taras, who knows her well, also says that war is "the most horrible invention ever created by humankind."

Before returning to the front, during summer vacation in Kiiv, you told me that your mission on the battlefield was "to kill Russians."

— Yes, and that's how it's been. But we're not murderers, we simply have no choice. For the past four yearsWe have been forced to destroy the Russians because they have come to attack our land and kill our people. And we will continue our work wherever any Russian soldier sets foot. I insist: we have neither a choice, nor was it our will to be fighting in a war.

Wars change people. How have they changed you?

— I was just like you. Before the invasion, I lived a normal life: I worked as a lawyer, raised my children, was building a house, and had hope for life and the future. Now, I struggle to feel emotions, and my life before has simply been erased. And I, like so many others, wasn't psychologically prepared for war. Now I feel like a mere survivor, powerless to make decisions, just another player in a game. where the only possible option to keep playing is to not get killedLately, I don't think I'm even afraid anymore.

What conclusion do you draw from these last four months on the front lines?

— I can only come to one conclusion: the war is not over, the war doesn't seem likely to end anytime soon, and the way this war is waged is constantly changing. I have seen a war more deadly than the last one. The so-called death zone between us and the Russians is becoming increasingly extensive and now exceeds 20 kilometers.

The kill zone?

— Yes, or the annihilation zone. It's the area that separates us from the Russian army, and it's full of killer drones, both ours and theirs, constantly flying over us. The skies in this area are so heavily monitored by drones that it's extremely easy for them to detect and kill you. And the drones are reaching farther and farther. The contact zone has disappeared, or rather, it's everywhere. I think people in Europe aren't aware of the number of heroes [Ukrainian soldiers] who die every day.

What can you tell us about these four months?

— It's been four months of hell. Death is always lurking around you. My men and I have survived by a miracle: the Russians bombed one of our strategic positions, we've had several drone attacks while moving from one place to another… I thank God we're alive. There have been injuries, some serious, but here the only thing that matters is being alive. Being alive is what's important.

The war is at a stalemate. Do you still believe in a Ukrainian victory?

— Victory has arrived. We have already won this war. We have managed to hold off the Russians for almost four years. From a strictly military perspective, you have to consider this: this war has already lasted longer than the war between Hitler's Germany and Stalin's Soviet Union. But with one essential difference: back then, Soviet troops had already reached Berlin, while here they haven't even been able to capture the Donetsk region in four years.

I ask again: do you still believe in a Ukrainian victory?

— Yes. We must believe.

How do you imagine victory?

— Victory must mean peace. And peace must mean that Ukraine can freely build its future and that all of us boys can return home safe and sound to our families. I often dream: the war is over, I go to football matches with my sons, I travel around Europe, and I rebuild a house so I can live peacefully. But unfortunately, these are just dreams. The war continues, and I believe the main battle is yet to come.

The main battle?

— Russia will not stop. Look at this winter; it's been the worst of the war: Russian bombs have left millions of Ukrainians without heat, and these days temperatures are below fifteen degrees below zero. Look at the cemeteries: they are expanding them because there is no more room for the corpses. There hasn't been a single day that the Russians haven't stopped attacking us.

What do you think about the negotiations that Trump is leading?

— I don't talk about politics. Our politicians are the ones who should be fighting that battle. My job is to stop the Russian advance on the battlefield. And this is what we soldiers must focus on.

Now you're on vacation again.

— Yes, it was a surprise. I was convinced we wouldn't be home for Christmas, because the army is short-staffed... But one day my superior called me and ordered me to gather my team, pack our things, and go home. It was a joyful, celebratory moment... especially for our families. who are waiting for us at home and praying for us every day.

What have you been doing these past few days?

— Above all, I love being with my family and friends. I'm so grateful for these moments. But I find it hard to disconnect from the front lines… I have brothers [comrades] who are still fighting these days, I talk to them, I want to be close to you. And I'm also studying how new ground drones work, which I'll soon start using on the battlefield.

Do you know when they'll send you back to the trenches?

— Soon, I suppose. Maybe tomorrow, maybe next week. Whenever it is, I have no choice but to be prepared.