"If we lose our desire, our soul becomes grayer."

BarcelonaElisabet Casanovas (Sabadell, 1994) arrives at the Teatre Lliure with her cello slung over her shoulder because tonight she has a performance of Little womenIn the mornings, it's rehearsal time. The theater has given him the perfect excuse to delve into the Newspapers by Anaïs Nin (1903-1977). "I was immediately captivated by her use of language and her profound commitment to her work, which is her diary, her life story. She lays herself bare, but through literature," she explains. The shamelessness of her diaries—which span four decades—her forays into erotic literature, and an unconventional love life have shaped the reception of the writer, one of the great literary influences of the 20th century. "I think that all the labels we unintentionally apply to her confine her. Anaïs says: 'I am amoral.' One could speak of polyamory, but also of an unquenchable thirst. I have the feeling that she is searching for something and finds in art a great balm to fill a void," she explains.

Casanovas will perform, with Francesc Garrido, a dramatized reading of Newspapers, Anaïs Ninwhich can be seen at Sala La Planeta on November 18, as part of the Temporada Alta festival, and at the Palau de la Música on December 2 and 12, as part of the festival Classics FestivalPoet Mireia Calafell and director Paula Errando have selected entries from the diary to give the play "something." The actress admits there's a breaking point: "There's a very clear before and after with the father's abuse and the whole issue of incest. And how from then on she begins to talk about the use of art." Although the author never described that relationship as abusive, "I think that with time she sees it, which is why she cuts ties with her father," the actress points out. "Today it's impossible not to consider that relationship without assuming the abuse. It blew my mind," Casanovas admits. The production can serve as a form of expiation: "We all look for what we can do with our pain. Perhaps the best thing you can do with your pain is validate it. There's a bit of that intention," she notes.

Pure passion

Anaïs Nin's diaries from the 1930s feature her husband Hugh, friends and lovers like Henry Miller and his wife June, the psychoanalysts Allendy and Rank, her father reunited after years of estrangement, men and women from a bohemian and cultured circle—those she loves, those she dreams of, those she dreams of erotically. "At that time, Excel didn't exist, but it would have served her very well," Casanovas explains. "She's an extremely empathetic woman because she understands others and knows how to take care of them. 'Caring comes so easily to her,' she says. This also provides a powerful space for reflection on why there's an ease with this behavior that is absolutely universal. I think she pours a lot of love into her relationships, but she knows that she won't receive it back, often; she knows that they aren't love."

The author is aware of the power of her diary; it's almost like another lover: "I live in terror of the diary being discovered," she writes. And yet, she writes them with the reader in mind: "I get the feeling she wants to create something worthwhile that leaves a legacy. Otherwise, why make copies?" Elisabet Casanovas asks. The actress has also written diaries at times, but now, when she sets her mind to it, she writes fiction. "I enjoy writing when there's truth and untruth. Playing with things that aren't yours but become yours because you understand them. With fiction, you can do that much more. What I find most difficult is committing yourself, taking off your masks when you expose yourself. That fascinates me. The raw truth. And I don't know if everyone does that, in life in general, right? Taking risks is what interests me most." Casanovas confesses that she puts a lot of passion and intensity into her profession and pours all her imagination into it, and that's why she needs "a very balanced and healthy personal life."

The Power of Theater

Since it rose to prominence a decade ago thanks to the series MarlineElisabet Casanovas hasn't stopped working in film, television, and theater, and she's barely 30 years old. "Everything is more fragile than it seems," she warns. Her vitality, talent, and curiosity are evident when she speaks. She could share with Anaïs Nin the same thirst, the same desire as a driving force. "I think that if we lose our desire, our souls become grayer. For me, desire is hope, and it's full of what hasn't happened yet, of how you'd like it to happen, of the slow burn. I think that desiring is important to dedicate time to things and work on them." As a famous actress, she has also had to make decisions about exposure and privacy in the age of social media. "What I want to be in the public eye has to do with my work, and I don't want to expose the rest; it's very simple. My Instagram is like a corkboard where I post work-related things. I think my channel isn't on the internet, and whatever I want to say, I'll do it from other places and from the stage," she explains.

Theater is her natural habitat. "I couldn't not do theater. It's something I've discovered over time, and it's good to know." Her defense of theater is remarkable: "I have the feeling that theater opens my instincts in a much broader way and propels my imagination toward much more vivid languages, to explain things that aren't related to an everyday space like we see on television. The commitment behind it. And also, simply put, it fills me with strength as a language and has a powerful ability to get people out of their homes to go and listen to a story: for all these reasons, it means a lot to me. Characters with long journeys. Everything can coexist with theater, and I love it."