"The partner you choose should be one you like and suit you."

According to psychologist and sexologist Elena Crespi, there are two questions you should ask yourself if you want to choose a partner and get it right. "Do I like this person? Is this person right for me? You should be able to answer yes to both questions: the partner you choose should be both appealing and right for you," she states emphatically. Too often, she explains, falling in love blinds us to what the other person is really like, we don't share values, or we fall into unbalanced relationships. That's why, when she met Xevi –Stick For friends, she reassured herself that the person she was falling in love with was real, and not a figment of her imagination or expectations. That is, that she liked him and that he was also good for her.

"When I met him, he was coming out of a complicated relationship and wasn't into stories. He was my brother's friend, and one day I said to him, 'This guy is handsome, isn't he?' And my brother replied, 'He's a wonderful person.' I was very clear that I wanted to see him as he was, that I wanted to see him as he was, that I wanted to. When you fall in love, you can get so high that you lose your bearings. It's fine to fly, but if you have to build a relationship, you have to do it on a real foundation, truly seeing the other person and also revealing yourself," Crespi points out. "It was very nice because we started talking at a festival in Torelló and this summer we've been together for 22 years," she adds.

Aside from the attraction and chemistry, she liked that he was a good person, that he shared a similar life plan, and that he was a feminist and leftist. "Having children has been really cool, and having them with shared responsibility makes you fall in love with your partner even more," Crespi says.

Lack of shared responsibility, in fact, is one of the main problems couples present with in consultations. "Especially in heterosexual relationships, couples are still very much defined by gender roles," says the psychologist.

Crespi is very clear that "love is about equality." "For me, love is a multiplier. Love helps you multiply everything you already have. Love should enrich our lives and make our days happier, despite the bad times, which will always be there. If you take stock, it should be worth it, it should be worth it a lot," the psychologist assures.