I have a love-hate relationship with Amsterdam. Some people seek an idealized, clean, orderly city with perfect houses, clogs, and tulips. And others seek drugs and seeing the prostitutes in the red-light district. I don't like either of those. I'm embarrassed by those groups of men standing around in front of shop windows, joking about whether or not they're going into a hat shop. I also don't like this idealization of the Netherlands as an orderly, methodical place where everything is more beautiful.