“With my eldest son, Luis, I experienced how, little by little, he was left alone. At first, due to his intellectual disability and autism, he didn't perceive it as much, he didn't understand it. But as he grew, he realized it, and this had a very big impact on his mental health,” explains Denisse, mother of Luis, 13 years old; of Izan, 12; and of Hugo, 6. This mother lives with the disability of two of her children: the eldest, Luis, who in addition to autism has a rare disease, and the youngest, who also has autism and ADHD. Knows well what it means to be left out of the social circle: no birthday parties, no cinema outings, no invitations to spend the afternoon. She suffers from it, and so does Luis, who is fully aware of it. “Having an illness or a disability doesn’t mean I can’t play. I want to play with friends, I want to have fun, I want to go to birthdays, I’m tired of not being invited, I have the same rights,” explained Luis himself in a video on his mother’s Instagram profile.explained Luis himself in a video on his mother’s Instagram profile.

Unique decor, activities designed to entertain the children, varied food, and, as a grand finale, a gift for guests to take home a souvenir of the day. A magazine-worthy (or, better said, Instagrammable) party—and surely also at a significant financial cost. But who's really the star of the celebration? The parents (to show off) or the child who's turning another year older? Imma Marín, president of the Institut del Joc, brings us closer, with her advice, to a genuine birthday party: without too many complications and where the child participates—according to the family's criteria and values—in the decision-making. "Their involvement is essential. Not only in deciding, but also in taking responsibility and doing things," she emphasizes. "The simpler and more straightforward the party, the more we make it accessible to the child. On the other hand, if we distance it from what the child can decide and participate in, it will be a party meant to look good—and everything will be adorable—but it will be harder for them to feel it's theirs."