The penis of James I the Conqueror has not disintegrated. The king's member has been preserved for over 750 years by being mummified. And most importantly of all: it still contains some sperm. Lídia Obiols is a true Catalan, with an accent from the Girona region, and has become president of Catalonia. Assuming a great responsibility, she feels called to allow herself to be penetrated by the Conqueror's great penis in order to recover the purity of the nation and beget a new line of Catalan kings who will do what "the spineless presidents of the process" have failed to do. Obiols will try to save "a country where there are no longer any white people" and put an end to the barbarity. woke, led by immigrants, feminists, homosexuals, and leftists.

The members of the historic Colla La Bota de Tarragona, a group that participates annually in the Carnival parade, have made an unprecedented decision and opted to reverse course and modify the theme they had planned for their performance through the city streets during the upcoming Carnival, as reported by the newspaper ARA. Under the name "Death Adventure," Colla La Bota—along with the comparsa Divax—intended to denounce what they perceive as the "decline" of PortAventura and highlight the labor issues they have raised against the park's workers. Throughout 2025, the unions organized several days of strikes to demand a new collective bargaining agreement, which garnered such significant support that they led to the suspension of ticket sales at the park. Ultimately, however, the theme for the two satirical groups during Carnival will be different.

The cartoonist Miquel Ferreres (Barcelona, ​​1950) celebrates fifty years in the profession this year. After his time in Catalan Post, The Vanguard and The NewspaperHe arrived at ARA, where he has published a daily cartoon since 2018. His friend Toni Batllori told him one day that the job they had chosen was a "sweet deal." Ferreres assures that, if it is, it's not because of the hours, the salary, or the amount of work, but because of the luck of dedicating himself to a job he likes and that, if he were born again, he would do again.

"The omnipotent Jaume Coll Llinàs, / professor emeritus of the UB, / executor of a legacy rotting in the open, / has created the Carner Chair for us, / where, as the perspicacious introducer that he is, / of ecdotic science to the homeland, / he teaches fear to the plant text." Thus begins one of the satirical poems written "in the manner" of the poet Josep Carner (1884-1970) and focused on criticizing the current dissemination of the work of the so-called Prince of Poets. It was written by a certain Norbert Planagumà i Mieres in One and double, the mysterious unpublished work that the ARA recently received. "Norbert Planagumà is a pseudonym that covers four individuals who refuse to show their faces," can be read in the prologue, which is entitled Instruction sheet–. Whether this is a boring act of cowardice is left to the discretion of each reader, who is undoubtedly more impartial than we are. Whether you believe us or not, if we remain anonymous it is more for reasons of convenience, because for the moment we prefer to live in bad company than reside in a prison. Neither can certain truths be proclaimed with impunity, nor do we have the vocation to go down in history as heroes.

Renew or die. The cabaret Berlin politician renews his repertoire with the change of government in Germany and the arrival of the conservative Friedrich Merz to the chancelleryThe German dictionary Duden defines cabaret, a Germanized word originating from French cabaret, as "minor art in the form of sketches and songs that parodic and humorously criticize the political situation or current events."