Read The idiot (1869) by Dostoevsky as a teenager. The Russian writer writes: "I am an idiot because I am different from them. I look at the world with compassion and understanding, and I believe in the goodness of people. But my goodness is mistaken for weakness, and my compassion is seen as foolishness. I am an idiot because I am alone in a world of fools." Prince Mixkin was indeed different. An orphan, he had suffered from minor epileptic seizures, had looked into the eyes of a man condemned to death, and spoke and loved in unconventional ways.